Toyin Aimakhu can best be described as a romantic gesture. The popular Yoruba actress, who is married to an actor, Adeniyi Johnson, shares with The Entertainer, her life, career, marriage, challenges and many more.
Excerpts.
What is Toyin doing lately?
I just shot a move entitled, 'Eta'. It is a story about a triplet and I played the three characters. Also, 'Alakada' will be coming out by July.
What was your growing up like?
It was sweet sort of though, I am from a poor background, it's a past issue now; I give God the glory. I grew up in a small community, like a village but it was fun. Trust me because we were so healthy, we ate fresh food and there was nothing to worry about.
Were your parents farmers?
No, they were not but that was what they could afford at that time. Though, we did a little farming, my mum is a pastor and founder of churches. My dad used to work with Ibru in Benin but has retired a long time. He is also helping in the church as well.
What was it like being poor?
Well, I didn't know we were poor; I just got to realize it. You know there are some people who are poor and you look at them that they are poor but they don't see it. It was later I realized that we were poor. It was later I realized that that was why we couldn't eat spaghetti because we couldn't afford it, and we ate rice once in a week. But to me it was fun and it was just a normal way of living. It was when I was growing up that it really dawned on me. When I got to school, I also noticed but really it was fun for me growing up that I hardly took notice that we were poor.
When you were in school were you a popular kid?
Not really, but when I was in St. Annes Secondary School, I drummed. I was a drummer girl. Then, I played handball and football. I was even in the Oyo State team.
How is married life?
Marriage is sweet because I got married to my friend; we fall into the same age range. But now things are different, you can't do things without informing the other person. Sometimes when I want to make some decisions and he is not around or his phone is not going, I have to wait. I also have to act like a mother but I am enjoying it all.
Which do you enjoy, is it being single or married?
Of course, I prefer being married. You can enjoy being single because you don't have anyone questioning you. But being married is sweeter because there is someone out there who cares so much about you. You are coming home to meet someone and there is someone out there who can go an extra mile for you, and you know, it is every woman's dream to get married. So, it is better off than being single in some ways.
You are both actors, how did you meet him?
I actually met him on set.
Was it love at first sight?
No, he was my junior colleague and he is still my junior colleague anyway. He just walked up to me and said he liked my movies and I said 'thank you'. You see, I am a kind of person that is very free with everyone. I don't keep to myself, even if you are an upcomer, I don't care who you are. I am just me and I am free with everybody. When my car was stolen, he had the opportunity to ask me about it, and we became friends. At that time I was single, I had issues with my ex, so we became friends and we got talking and I realized he was even three years older than me. I also realized he is a fantastic guy and very intelligent. I was like let's give it a trial.
There is a tattoo on your hand, in the name of your husband, why?
Well, it is his name. I just did it. You know a lot of people don't know me; they just judge me from the screen. But the thing about screen is that, when you see ladies, actresses or actors that kiss a lot in the movies or that go extra length, they are always the calm and the decent ones. I am not saying that others are indecent but it's always like that, a lot of people don't know me, they don't even know who I am. They only see me on screen, well, that must be the mistake I made, being real with my roles. For instance, now I am telling people who are training under me that 'most times you can't get too real with some roles because this is the mistake I had made myself'.
You have to cut down some things; maybe at that point I didn't see someone to tell me. So, they don't even know me, they don't know who I am, a lot of people judge me from the screen. But I am not what a lot of people think. I don't even go out. I just started going out when I got married. The reason I didn't go out when I was single was because when you go out a lot, you meet a lot of people and you get confused. That is why some people, today they meet a rich man and tomorrow they meet someone richer. So, at that time, I didn't want to get confused. I just wanted to stay at home and later meet a good man. Now that I have met my man, I go out more often because even if you are richer than whatever in this world, I have got my man and wearing my wedding ring.
What are the challenges you have been faced with in the industry?
A lot. You see, a lot of people see you in a movie and they judge you based on the characters you played. You know, they deal with you according to the roles you play in the movies. But it's not like that because I just did my job. Even when I got married they were like 'isn't she an actress?' There is a sort of stigma on us and they forget that what some girls out there do is far worse than what we do. But we are in the limelight. I am not a young girl. I am an adult. I graduated like nine years ago.
So, I want what I want and I can tell you the guys I have dated. I am a lover girl, when I am dating someone everybody knows because I don't know how to hide my relationship. When we have problems, people will be like, 'see, she is not dating this person again'. But sit down and count the guys I have dated, they are not even up to five and I have never dated any married man in my life. Let any woman come out and say I have dated her husband. I have never done that. When people go on blogs and say sh-t about me, some people just go on the internet and say rubbish about people, let them come out and challenge me. Those are the things we face; they say actresses get married to married men. What about people who are not actresses that do the same?. I am not saying it is right or wrong, I am just saying that everyone has his or her opinion. However, I understand we are role models and a lot of people look up to us.
Recently, it was all over the Internet that you were pregnant, are you pregnant?
Do I look pregnant? I think it is the dress, you can see I look slim here. It is a positive thing and I am happy. I can't wait to be a mother. When you are married in Nigeria the next thing is getting pregnant, but my husband is young and I want to be with my husband now. When the kids start coming, the attention will shift, so let me love my husband and we will have kids. But if I get pregnant now, it is fine. It's going to come, please help me tell them to chill.
What great lessons did your parents teach you that you couldn't forget?
Do what makes you happy but think of people around you. And also pray.
You said earlier that your mother is a pastor?
She is not just a pastor; she is also a founder of churches. She has like five churches.
What was your parents' reaction when you told them you were going to be an actress?
They didn't like it at first but my mum just called me and gave me some words of advice, that I should hold the family's name in high esteem. They don't watch movies but sometimes people watch and they tell them, and when they ask me about some roles I played, I try to explain to them or sometimes I just tell them that's not me. I won't lie to you; I have played roles in movies that I regret. Trust me. But what will I do? Will I kill myself? Of course not. I just smile over it and look the other way. You know, it is because of the passion I have for this job, I play some roles and I want them to look real. When I leave the set, I will be like 'why did I do this?' Or when I watch some of my movies, I will ask myself 'why did I play this role like this?' Often times I wonder why I have not met my husband long time ago to correct me about some things. Was I dating the wrong people back then? Why is it that some of my senior colleagues didn't tell me about this?
How did he propose to you?
He proposed on a cheap canoe (laughs). We were coming from Ikorodu and there was this mad traffic. We were running late and we had to do a job quickly. We had to park our car at Badore and hop on the canoe. He proposed right there. When we were coming back and even if I wanted to say no, I dare not because we were on the sea (laughs). But I was happy; I knew I was going to get married to a young man because I told God 'if I don't get married to a young man, I would rather remain single than marry a married man'.
What blew me away in your acting was the movie, Alani Baba Labake. You were so deep in your acting, what really inspires you?
I never wanted to be an actress because it was not my dream; it was not my passion. I never saw it coming. I wanted to be a physiotherapist, I wanted to go to University of Ibadan because I had friends there, but I had problems with my admission and my result wasn't complete. So, I had to go to Ire Polytechnic and later OOSU. I just wanted to help people. But it happened that my late brother had a friend and he had an uncle who was a marketer then. So, when I lost my brother, the guy sent someone to give me something and he told me that if we needed anything that I could come to him because someone had already told him that my late brother was our breadwinner.
That day, as I wanted to drive off, he asked me who owned the car. And I told him it was my friend's car and that she was in University of Ibadan. He then asked if I knew Bukky Wright and I said yes, he now said that Bukky Wright wanted to shoot a movie in Ibadan and that she needed someone who knew Ibadan very well. I was so elated when I met Bukky Wright. I remember when they were shooting they were all waiting for someone who I guess was Ireti Osayemi; so they asked me to stand in for her. But when they saw the way I acted, they were very impressed. The next day, Muyideen just walked up to me and said he wanted someone to play Rachael Oniga's younger sister, because back then I had this Ibadan girl makeup. I created a dark spot on my face, a sort of mole. So, Muyideen asked me if it was real and I said 'yes it was real'. I said that because I was a very playful girl. They said they needed a fresh face. I asked him if he would give me money and he said yes. I asked him about the location and he said Lagos. I was a bit withdrawn about coming to Lagos but I eventually came and that was it.
Was there a time you wanted to pull out of acting because you got so overwhelmed with the challenges?
No, there was no time like that. I have never been harassed. As a matter of fact, I dated someone in the industry, that was some few years back and it was because I wanted to date him. We liked each other and we decided to date. We had a relationship, so I was never abused, nobody asked me for sex. When some people say that, I am like maybe it's because of their appearance, because when I get to location, I greet everyone with respect.
